Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Suffering in Culture - Part 1

My wife organizes a weekly presentation at our Parish every Tuesday evening, called Spirituality Tuesday. This is a major excerpt from the presentation called Our Experience of Suffering in Culture and in Faith by Sherry Cassedy, which I found to be a beautifully written thought provoking explanation, and exceptionally relevant to our lives. Although my life’s story is different I am grateful to have been present at this presentation, because it so strongly represents my understanding of suffering. Some of it has been edited and some of it hasn’t, but this is her work alone.

She began with a quote from Louis Lavelle, “Suffering gives us an extraordinary intimacy with ourselves; it produces a form of introspection in which the spirit penetrates to the very roots of life, where it seems that suffering itself will be taken away”. Her personal encounter with suffering began when she lost her youngest son, to a skateboarding accident, which propelled her into a deep spiritual questioning about the meaning of life, death, and suffering. She talked about how we encounter suffering in our culture, and how suffering is understood in the context of various faith traditions. C.S. Lewis, after the loss of his wife, wrote that “We each bring our own stories of grief and suffering, or our stories bring us. Each of our stories is different but also the same. Suffering is not a singular experience, but universal [even] though each grief is unique.

In a broad sense suffering is our experience of unpleasantness or aversion associated with harm or threat of harm. It may be physical or mental, emotional, and even psychic; it comes in varying levels of intensity, compounded by frequency and duration, from mild to intolerable. Our attitudes toward suffering take into account how much, in our opinion, it is avoidable or unavoidable, useful or useless, deserved or undeserved.  We live in a culture that avoids suffering, by seeking and celebrating pleasure. The tendency is to avoid suffering at all costs, and if it is not possible to avoid it altogether then to get past it as quickly as possible. When people encounter someone who is suffering they will either pull away completely, or they will want to be reassured that we are “getting over it”. To confront the reality that we may not be better, or over it, challenges their reality. It is threatening to the ideal of pleasure and happiness, and it is counter-cultural, which is for those who are suffering an alienating experience.

It is strenuous and tiresome to be with people who cannot acknowledge the pain of others, or even acknowledge their own pain. Being able to acknowledge the pain is hugely liberating, and it allows us to then move beyond it. To deny it, leaves us stuck and exhausted. It is important to face the reality that many of us do suffer, are suffering, and to find a place to reflect on that in community.  It may be easier to push the bad memories under the rug of consciousness and think only about the good things. But by doing so we keep ourselves from discovering the joy beneath the sorrow; the meaning to be coaxed out of even painful experiences and memories, finding the strength that becomes visible in our weakness. It is important to walk with sorrow and to seek a community with whom to explore it.

One of the extraordinary insights that Pope John Paul II shares in his letter On Human Suffering is this: “In itself human suffering constitutes as it were a specific world which exists together with man, which appears in him and passes, and sometimes does not pass, but which consolidates itself and becomes deeply rooted in him. This world of suffering, divided into many, very many subjects, exists as it were “in dispersion”. Every individual, through personal suffering, constitutes not only a small part of that world, but at the same time that world is present in him as a finite and unrepeatable entity. Parallel with this, however, is the inter-human and social dimension. The world of suffering possesses as it were its own solidarity. People who suffer become similar to one another through the analogy of their situation, the trial of their destiny, or through their need for understanding and care, and perhaps above all through the persistent question of the meaning of suffering. Thus, although the world of suffering exists “in dispersion”, at the same time it contains within itself a singular challenge to communion and solidarity.” His insight into suffering is so powerful because in contrast to the sense of alienation in our culture, in suffering we can find communion and solidarity.

Saturday, May 26, 2012

Two Problems

I believe that there are always two problems that need to be fixed.

Early on I discovered that fixing a technical problem didn't always satisfy the customer. Although I was solving the actual physical problem that needed to be corrected, I was not resolving the customer's perception of the problem. From this I realized that it's important to recognize that there are always two distinct problems that are equally important, and both must be addressed before determining that the "problem is resolved." Eventually I learned that this is true in all things, whether it's two different views of the same problem or two different sides to an arguement.

Both sides of the problem are equally important and both need to be addressed to ensure that the problem is fixed.

Saturday, May 19, 2012

Doing Your Best

I believe that everyone is doing the best that they can.

I realize that this is hard to recognize given the state of the daily news, but for me this applies to everyone; regardless of whether your a Lawyer, a member of a gang, on death row, living on the street, or going to church every day. Obviously most of us are not "doing the right thing" all the time, but this does not mean that we are not trying in some way to be the best that we can be.

Some people find it difficult and even next to impossible to do the right thing for themselves or others, and some are unsure of what the "right thing" is, but these people are also doing the best that they can within the context of their lives. We're all flawed people trying to get along in a flawed world, and we all fail at times to be the person that we ought to be.

Nevertheless, I believe that everyone without exception is trying to do the best that they can.

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

The Shoe Box

A friend of mine was asked by a friend (of hers) how to continue sharing faith with her children during the summer. My friend shared an idea which she calls "The God Box". She has a shoe box in to which she places a variety of objects, mostly odds and ends and other things found around the house. She asks her children to take out one of the objects and explain how God is like the object. "God is like this eraser, erasing all our mistakes." God is like this stick of glue, holding us all together." God is like this pair of glasses, helping us to see things clearly."

A parable is a succinct story, either in prose or verse, which illustrates one or more instructive principles, lessons, or a universal truth. In the parables found in the Bible, which remain some of the best known stories in the world, Jesus too used common objects to teach his disciples about the Kingdom of God. "The Kingdom of God is like this pearl", "The Kingdom of God is like this mustard seed", etc. One obvious characteristic of the parables we find in the Bible is the presence of a prescriptive subtext; suggesting how a person should behave or believe.

Quite often Jesus' parables are about ordinary men and women who find surprising things happening in the midst of their everyday lives. Although these parables seem like simple memorable stories, the messages they convey are deep and central to the teaching of Jesus. They may refer to simple everyday things, such as a woman baking bread, a man knocking on his neighbor's door, or the aftermath of a roadside mugging; yet they deal with major religious themes, such as the growth of the Kingdom of God, the importance of prayer, and the meaning of love. Take some time to think about one of your favorite simple Bible stories, and then find an item for your mental shoe box.

Saturday, May 12, 2012

Doing the Right Thing

I believe that people are basically good, and that although some people are better than others, everyone is trying to do the "right thing".

While it's obvious to each of us that lots of people fail at being good to others, it isn't always obvious that even those people, deep down inside, are trying to be good to themselves and to others. The goodness of others can be hidden so deep that it's hard for them to find or for us to see. Evil doesn't come from within us, it creaps into our lives from the outside and is so easy to ignore that some people become overwhelmed with it.

Nevertheless, I beleive that everyone is trying to be good.

Saturday, May 5, 2012

Personal Mission Statement

I believe that my personal mission is "To leave the world a better place than I found it; by being a positive influence to others, and by doing the best that I can in all things."

I will never be famous, rich, or talented, but I can be helpful to others. Every one of us is struggling with our daily lives. I may not always be able to put my needs behind the needs of others, or keep a positive attitude at all times, or even do the best that I can no matter what.

Nevertheless, my goal is to do what I can to make the lives of those I meet better.

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Summer Break

Well that's it! Another year has come and gone, and the students at the Institute for Leadership in Ministry program are on a well-deserved summer break; or at least it feels well deserved. Tonight is the graduation ceremony for the Class of 2012, and since there will be no classes until next September I'll be doing something different for awhile. For instance again this year I may do some posts on the books that I've read for the various classes and / or some posts titled "I Believe".

This year I've been taking notes on a tablet computer and I think you'll agree that I've been going a better job of accurately presenting the instructors ideas. Although I no longer have to transcribe my notes I do have to edit them into complete paragraphs again, which reinforces the information from the lectures and discussions. The five or six lectures per class are not enough time to adequately cover each subject, but although everyone including the instructors would like to have more class time, running the program year around doesn't seem to be an option. Again this year, the program has been well organized, the staff has been professional (and friendly), and the training has been exceptional.

Please allow me to thank everyone who is reading my blog; His blog, I hope, it's not about me, it's about the One who inspires me daily to be the person I am trying to be. I hope that you are learning something too or at least finding it interesting. My desire is to faithfully reflect my belief in Jesus' love for us, my witness of God's grace in my life, and my understanding of the Catholic Church in the world. Thank you for taking this journey with me, and thanks to those who have commented and assisted me with grammar, etc. I really appreciate the help!